Life Is Much Too Fragile

I tend to get dreams, intuitions and feelings that I cannot always explain, or pinpoint. When this happens I know my spirit is forcing me to pray because there's someone who needs it,  including me. Certain times I've been able to relay messages that have been given to me from God and people were astonished by them. Most times I do not know who,  why or where until after the fact. I don't talk about it much.

For the last few weeks I've had a heavy feeling of impending doom. I kept thinking something bad was going to happen to someone close to me. I've been hugging hubs a little tighter lately, trying to shake off those dark vibes. I realized those feelings were not totally incorrect this morning as I received a phone call from a dear friend, who sadly had devastating news to share.

My heart is aching right now. The only way I know how to even digest this news is to write. I will be praying in warrior mode for my friend, who is like a sister to me. Please pray with me, as God will know the direction.

Life is much too fragile for us not to wrap our arms around it and pull it safely close. Time is not on our side, so instead of stealing those precious moments we should be basking in them. Tell your loved ones you love them, show them that love and in turn share it with those on this journey with you.

(I love you my sweet friend and soul sister. I'm here for you when you're ready, for whatever you may need) 

♡,  april XO

Addictions

So I shared this photo for the first day of SUMMER because it reminded me of the lake I used to go to as a kid with my mom,  dad,  & brother, but my sister was younger &  didn't have that experience.  So her memory of the lake was our ex step dad.  He was a good guy,  but an alcoholic. For many years I was somehow granted the duty of protecting my brother and sister from his craziness. This day was the day I confirmed to Dennis & placed his mind at ease, that I forgave him for his drinking,  his blackouts,  his abuse towards our mom (that was unwillingly allowed) .  It's not pretty.  But it's real. He was drunk even then. Shortly after he passed away because his organs shut down. That's what's real to me.  He knew I forgave him and he finally forgave himself.  Sadly it was too late.  I forgive,  but I can't forget.  Love you Dennis,  RIP.  See you when I see you.  *If you or someone you love is an alcoholic please know there is help.

Learning As I GrOw- A Father's Love

As a little girl I was definitely a daddy's girl. He couldn't stand to hear me cry as a baby so he'd rock me to sleep more often than not. He was there for me in the middle of the night when I had nightmares and the one who would actually get in the kiddie pool with me. To a child these things are of high importance. We'd plant flowers, go blueberry picking, build snowmen, go sledding, and so much more. As I grew, I saw the hard working, God fearing family man that he was; and still is. The most important thing he ever taught me was that Jesus loves me, He lives in my heart and to always trust in Him. As I became a teen it wasn't so cool to hug your dad, get & give kisses or hang out together. After my parents divorce we moved out of state which placed a strain on our relationship, not because of anything anyone did, it's something that just happens. A few weeks in the Summer became our new normal. As a woman I now can appreciate the ups & downs of life. You see things so differently as a child. The love I have for my dad remains true, even when we don't see eye to eye. Not once has he missed a birthday or Christmas and although it is difficult for him to express in person, the cards he sends really do say it all. My dad will always be my hero. You see, his love for our heavenly Father was the greatest lesson I ever learned from him. We continue to make memories, reminiscent of the old. I am grateful to still have him in my life. Whether you had a father figure in your life or not, regardless of the type of relationship it was or is please know that God is there, taking their place, loving and leading. Thank you dad for introducing me to your Father above, who in turn is mine and who can be yours.